When I was in high school, the only thing I absolutely wanted to do was study theatre in college. Maybe I’d move to New York or another big city, or maybe I’d work in D.C., and maybe I’d have a career that didn’t involve theatre at all. But I’d be happy because I’d just perform in community theatres and it would be this hobby I got to do for the rest of my life.
I promised myself that no matter what, theatre was always going to be a part of my life.
And then I left my community college with one class to go (spoiler alert for everyone who thought I graduated because I was too embarrassed to correct them) and I moved to Florida where I have not once even auditioned or volunteered to help tech a single show. I have let myself down.
26 isn’t old, I know that. In the grand scheme of things I do understand that I actually am still quite young. But it FEELS old because it is the oldest I’ve ever been (well, I’m still 25, but only for another week). It definitely feels like too old to go back to school to study acting in a program that is bound to be full of bright eyed 18-year olds. But somehow I’m starting to feel like this has to be my next move. It’s terrifying, but isn’t there a saying about how “anything worth doing will scare you a little” or something? I don’t know, but in any case, I can’t break the only promise I ever dared to make myself. Right?
So I don’t know what exactly my next step is, but I do know that I’ve got a lot of thinking and planning to do. And fast. Because can you imagine what would happen if I waited until I was *gulp* twenty-seven?
Until I figure out more life details, I’ll just be here googling dream apartments while I play the Dear Evan Hansen soundtrack over and over and over again.
Talk to ya’ll soon,